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14 Guyz n' Ralphus is not so much a group, but more of a lifestyle. If you don't understand, then listen up. When fourteen guys get together, Ralphus shows up. Get it? Do some research. |
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Ralphus - Man, myth or legend?
Created by: Veggie JacksonRalphus is a HUNKSICLE!! We need some more guys in here!
Kamooku Ralphusaki; a shining example of what it means to be pure of heart. :-D
While very insightful, Veggie Jackson's last comment was filled with common misconceptions about Ralphus history. Lesson 1 - Japanese History....Ralphus style Yes, Ralphus is now known as "Fat Toothless Security Man" in Japan. However the idea of Ralphus appearing only to the first 14 children to suffer spinal cord injuries each year is simply false. Shinto is the oldest religion in Japan. It mainly incorporates the worship of Kami gods. One of the most infamous Kami was Kamooku Ralphusaki. It is written that Kamooku Ralphusaki was the first and greatest samurai of all time. He was known for his brutal fighting tactics as well as his unorthodox battle armour. While most Samurai eventually would wear full bronzed chest plates, Kamooku Ralphusaki wore decorated half shirts spun from silk. They always had the same strange symbol. Many Japanese scholars will translate the symbol as the word "tabako" meaning tobacco or cigarette." However Shinto historians will translate it as "hiragano kingyo" meaning "Protector of Jericho." In the Battle of Hakata Bay against the Mongols, Japan's army was decimated. Surrounded by roughly ten thousand Mongols, only 14 of Japan's finest soldiers remained. Grossly outnumbered, they formed a circle and agreed to die honorably while swinging their swords. The ground trembled from the unified march of ten thousand Mongols advancing. A flash of light brighter than a million suns appeared, blinding both armies. When vision returned to the Japanese soldiers, ten thousand Mongols lie dead. What force was responsible for this miracle the soldier wondered? Their question was soon answered as Kamooku Ralphusaki pushed his way through piles of slaughtered Mongols. He announced that from that point forward, any time 14 men were in distress, Ralphusaki would appear. This lesson was sponsored by Supple Records.
The 14 Guys and Ralphus concept is, of course, well known world wide. But just like Santa Claus, specific details vary from region to region. In Japan, for example, Ralphus is known as "Fat Toothless Security Man" and appears only to the first 14 children to suffer spinal cord injuries each year. In Madagascar, Ralphus is believed to live at the center of the Earth, and is thought to be responsible for all sickness and suffering. He is not well liked there. Each Spring, Ecuadorian children don elaborate costumes and separate into group of 13 in order to mock Ralphus and his security services. Finally, the Swedes view Ralphus as a God-King. This explains why all Swedish homes have exactly 14 occupants. While Ralphus appreciates the respect and loyalty of the Swedes, the extreme strain of appearing in over 650,000 homes daily can be taxing.